Forgiveness and Mental Health

The progress on “King Saul’s Throne” today represents 37 hours of work.

The next stage is building the back of the throne.

This throne symbolises the dynamics of “unforgivness.” 

Forgiveness and Mental Health, a Stepping Stone to Recovery.  

Oct. 11, 2012  

            

On Wednesday afternoon the day before Oct. 11, I’d completed my ¾ hour talk for this event. All I had to do was prepare the power-point.

At about midnight, I completed it. I brought up the speaking notes for my talk and inserted the queue notes for the technician who would operate the power point as I spoke. I pressed print and walked to the next room to pick up the printout. When I came back, my computer had gone into the “automatic loading of program upgrade” mode! I saw that my precious power-point was not on the screen. I quickly tried to find it and realised to my horror that I had not saved it. You are right. My worst fears had happened, it had been obliterated! Gonzo!

I took a deep breath! Now, I had to forgive that most crazy idiot...myself! I considered the situation. Do I really need the power-point? Do I have the time before I need to leave for Winkler at 6:45AM to get it done? I had my queue notes indicating all the pictures and notes I had put together and decided with this list it would not be hard to replicate. I felt I could really motor and do it fast. Maybe even have an hour or so for a quick snooze before I’d have to leave.

I made a coffee and went for it.

I got it done just before I needed to take my shower and get going. I was now praying that my mind, without a nights sleep, not stall on me somewhere along the line. Especially of concern was the last item on the program, the panel discussion. This is the kind of activity for which you need all your faculties. Especially, since the questions were coming from the audience and were not pre-prepared questions directed from a friendly moderator! I grabbed some Tylenol on my way out to the van!

The next hurdle was my crazy decision to take a different route than we’d usually taken to Altona. Since Winkler was West of Altona I decided to take the number 3 off the perimeter. This I felt would be more direct and therefore be a quicker way of getting there. I knew where it was but in the dark I made a wrong turn off the S. perimeter highway. I realised the mistake when the pavement suddenly ended and I seemed to be on roads only farm implements take from one field to another!

Making turns in the general direction Hwy. #3, I finally found it and made up some time I’d lost. I arrived only 8 minutes past my scheduled arrival time of 8am. I still had time to set up my sculptures before it all started. Whew.

The rest of the day went well. I was scheduled to share at 10:45am till noon. I used the morning to have a coffee and muffin so kindly provided for the guests. while the first speaker spoke, I found a quiet section of the foyer and went through my talk again, centering and calming my spirit for my presentation.

They had appointed a couple to “host” me and they were very kind and understanding.  They certainly had the gift of hospitality, very sensitively walking me through each aspect of the day. I came to appreciate them very much.

My goal was to be as honest and straight up as possible about my journey of forgiveness. After my talk several members of the audience spoke to me of “resonating” with my story as they had experienced or struggled in similar ways.  

My “all-nighter” caught up with me during the presentation following lunch. I caught myself nodding off a few times. I hope the folk behind me were just thinking I was agreeing with the speakers comments!

The dreaded “panel discussion” was quite ok. First, I managed not to nod off in front of the audience. Secondly, the professionals took most of the questions so I was off the hook! Fantastic.

It was fantastic that the Eden Mental Health organisation sponsored such an event on this subject. How is it that we have this amazing gift of forgiveness given to us? Something, which can increase our quality of life to a huge and fantastic degree. It can save our physical health, our emotional health our mental health and our very lives. It can reduce pain, missed work, and therapy bills. Still, we have such problems with it. We don’t understand it. We resist it.

I know from personal experience that it is not easy. It takes work. It takes determination and dedication. It feels counter intuitive but let me tell you it is worth it. I feel so blessed that my family and I have found this secret. It has changed our lives completely. Considering our history and the possibilities, we are so fortunate. We are all in a good place. It has been our deliverance. We are satisfied customers and recommend it to everyone.

“Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive someone who sins against me? Up to seven times? Jesus answered, “ I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.”

Matthew 18:21-22